Front Row Seat (Reflections on a Church Conference to Disaffiliate)

As a representative leader of the UMC, I sat on the front row of a Church Conference where I heard of how the UMC is led by people who are “incompetent and immoral,” who “trade God’s Word for the secular ideology of the world,” who “abandon doctrine” in order to not offend anyone, and who want to bend our will to “pagan cultural Marxism.” It was all part of a continuing effort to build a “damning case against the UMC.”  Damn! Condemn! Declare as evil! As I listened, I could not think of any leader who deserved such hurtful and judgmental attacks, even considering isolated examples. The main speech concluded with a prayer calling for us to part ways as Paul and Barnabas did and to love one another even if from afar – familiar talking points, shared as pleas to God.

To counter this narrative, I heard grace-filled speeches calling for unity in love, even in the midst of different perspectives.  I heard of how a few isolated examples do not represent the whole. I heard of a trust in the Holy Spirit to keep us all centered, allowing us to honor perspectives that stand at the edges of theological interpretation. This is a dynamic that has always been a part of healthy congregations.   I heard much love for the UMC and for our doctrine, liturgy, mission, and ministry. I so appreciated the spirit with which these truths were shared.  

When the votes were counted, however, division won the day – by 4 votes.  It was winner-take-all! There were no provisions for those who want to remain UMC, many of whom have given of their tithes, taught Sunday School, and shared in holy communion and potlucks for years. There was no honoring of the larger church that had given pastors, provided equipping and resources and offered an opportunity to be a part of a global mission bigger than ourselves.  I thought of the person who said, after hearing of a love for our doctrine and discipline, “the videos I watched told me you would say that and that you would be lying.” That’s the spirit that won the day.   

For me, it felt as if the Spirit of God left the room, leaving the space as something other than holy.  I then looked up at the stained-glass image of Jesus, and I sensed the presence of Christ.  Knowing that Living Lord was there for all, I especially sensed his presence with those whose hearts were broken and who were fighting back tears. I want to stand with these beloved and faithful souls as well.   

A Balcony Perspective on Disaffiliation

I sat in the balcony for a Church Conference on disaffiliation.  From the balcony, it hit me that this meeting was being held in the sanctuary. Several speakers went off script and referred to weddings, baptisms, funerals, and regular worship in this sacred space. I began to wonder about the spiritual damage that was being done, knowing that some would be cut off from this rootedness.     

From the balcony, I wondered about using the honored word “discernment,” used in this case to describe the pitting of two sides against one another and moving to a vote to divide. True discernment usually looks different, with people willing to suspend judgement, listen, and seek life-giving outcomes – “unity of spirit in the bond of peace.” (Eph 4:1-3).  

From the balcony, I wondered about the harm caused by voting. A friend recently pointed out that the only recorded vote in the New Testament was when Pilate asked the people to choose between Jesus and Barabbas (Matt 27:21). The only time the word “vote” is found is where Paul confesses to his vote to condemn Stephen and other Christians to death (Acts 26:10).  It is not a glowing endorsement. While voting may be necessary on occasion, especially around organizing for ministry, there are a lot of options before this last resort – conversation, conferencing, catechism, consensus, compromise, and shared calling above all.   As we discern and decide, we would do well to remember that the word “party” includes the word “part.”  To set up a winner-take-all vote to make a part the whole is…(what’s the right adjective)…so dishonoring of the Body of Christ.  

From this particular balcony, the attempts at politeness did not take the sting away from familiar rhetoric. I once again heard isolated examples of statements from professors or un-ordained students as the justification for the harm being caused.  I wondered what would happen if we spent our energies, particularly around seminaries, reflecting on the historic questions that have to be answered for ordination.  How might we judge theological education if we read the papers of actual students?  I get to do this every year and continue to be inspired by how the historic apostolic faith of the church will continue to be passed on from one generation to the next.  To this end, it is good that students who are called to serve the church as pastors come in contact with a variety of views in the world.

In this particular case, the vote to disaffiliate failed by a few votes.  I was relieved. And then reality set in. As a part of my job, I had to walk down the stairs and into the pain of a divided congregation.  It wasn’t long before I overheard conversations about how all the talk of wanting to be a “big tent” – Body of Christ – congregation, rooted in scripture, centered in Christ, and united in the core doctrines of our faith was all a cover for some nefarious agenda.  The level of accusation against those who were once friends, and the willingness to trust those working for division, was alarming.  I met with those who had worked hard for this outcome, but there was no celebration.  People were pleased, but no one was happy.  A deep hope, however, remained, — that this would continue to be a congregation that truly believed in the Living Lord who was at work to keep the church as a whole centered in faith, hope, and above all love.   That’s what will see us all through.